"Yet a time is coming
and has now come when the true worshipers will worship
the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the
kind of worshipers the Father seeks." - John 4:23

My Heavenly Daddy is healing
me from the inside out.

Transparency is Real.
Many times painful.

Daddy let me be secure in You only!

Friday, April 17, 2009


Today, on my day off, I found myself naturally doing my “mind walks,” enjoying a pretty nice day outside. Humidy low with a nice gentle breeze. Still it can be a beautiful day on the outside, but in the inside a storm is raging. At one point, as brief as it was, I came into reality and thanked God for the nice beautiful weather He provided for my walks, to be able to have the sun shine on my face and breathe the air He supplied! Then deep within I felt the groaning (as soooo many times before) of so much pain and me saying out loud in desperation as I concluded my walk, “Take It Lord,” and a gentle voice saying back to me, “You Have Not Released It To Me Yet.”


  1. Wow! Such gut-level honesty...(I wuz gonna write we're not used to it, but we ARE!)...keep on writing here, I believe it does all of us good, and if ya wish, pretty much anonymity is here.

    Other point: My blog today, "Is it real" etc, was inspired by your blog, AND your writings. Just wanted you to know!

  2. I often wonder at the amount of pain us humans can tolerate. I certainly had my share of what I considered 'unbearable emotional and mental pain".

    I have found that TIME and the practice of my 12 steps and plenty of prayer and TIME and more practice and more "keeping on keeping on" and more TIME has eliminated most of that unbearable heartache.

    God is so very good. He hears and he always answers - often just not as fast as I would like.

    Prayers going your way. KUTGW (Keep up the good work!),
    Prayer Girl

  3. Praise the Lord. You are never alone. He is inside you and His shoulder is broad enough to take all our problems. Thank God for everything He has done for us. Peace with you all the times, God bless,

  4. Surrender sounds so much easier than it is done. The Lord will teach you how to do this, you may find it a surprising path to trek down. God Bless!

  5. I think I release it to God and then take it back again and then release it and take it back again ... and again. Such a struggle. But it is real!!
    To answer your question on my blog, I got some templates from Blogger Buster. I think different people contribute templates to them. Some work out good and others do not. I tried many before I found one I liked.

  6. now that's honest... don't give up, you'll release it. some day.

  7. When your time is right, that is when.

    I wish a peaceful weekend for you.


  8. I have had similar walks. Talking with God, and being quiet enough with in ones soul to listen the voice responding back.

    The fact that you heard him speak to you is positive. Hearing that voice is the fist step of ones journey to healing. Keep talking with him, and keep listening allowing him to guide you to the point of letting go. Hugs sweet blogger friend.

  9. stuck-in-the-middleApril 18, 2009

    I hope you have a good weekend and feel Gods love.

  10. Letting go can be the hardest thing to do..when you're ready..it will happen, and you wont be able to stop it from occuring...be patient with yourself - that's the key, as I believe it to be...hang in there, and keep being REAL!!!!!!!

    (btw..I posted an update on that one site I wrote about )

  11. Keep on keeping on Just Be Real.

    God loves you - He will keep you beside Him.

    Thank you again for your honesty and encouragement. I continue to pray for you.

    God Bless


  12. Ambersun-Thank you for the constant reminder and prayers that our God does love us.
    Eva-I quite agree, letting go is awful hard!! At the same time if I would only let go now, I would be on my way sooner. But, hey there is a plan in on this.
    Stuck-Thank you for your faithful visits.
    Tracy-Thank you for the confirmation that God does speak to us (not necessarily audibly), but within ones own heart and in His Word!
    Liza-Your support and encouragement are always welcomed dear.
    Shadow-Amen sista'. Look forward to the day of freedom!
    Colleen-I hear ya. Some days are better than others. We release, and then we take back. Thank you for your visit.
    T.Anne-Yes, I believe too that the Lord will show me when the time will come. I just need to remain open to this!
    James-Thank you so much for your continued uplifting posts.
    Prayer Girl-Certainly appreciate your prayers. Thank you. In time, as always God will do what must be done.
    Stevie-Ahhhh, to be honest! I never used to be sir, let me to you that! I still feel I am a-ways from being totally transparent. But, I cannot fool God!

  13. I am amazed at the beauty of God's creation and that He is in everything, except for my brain. My mind can cause sinerios that can go on for hours. Or the torment I can put myself through. I like that you said it was beautiful outside and stormy on the inside. That is so true for me also. You are not alone, and yes I really need to give it to God as it starts, instead of staying there. God bless you sister, and if you still need help with your blog. Let me know. Love Tanya

  14. Tanya-So sorry you share the same pain of turmoil. Thank you for your kindness dear one.

  15. I feel so bad that I don't have the 'spiritual' words to offer you. I'm just not in that space right now. But I am 'real' and I am 'honest' and a mentor of mine once told me that 'we' humans do that...we want God to take control, but since we're human and he designed us that way...we pull it back.
    He understands that (I think) since he created us.
    In your time...