"Yet a time is coming
and has now come when the true worshipers will worship
the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the
kind of worshipers the Father seeks." - John 4:23

My Heavenly Daddy is healing
me from the inside out.

Transparency is Real.
Many times painful.

Daddy let me be secure in You only!

Monday, October 18, 2010

BEING HONEST WITH OURSELVES


Being honest with ourselves is probably one of the hardest things to do. I mean, if we can end up lying to ourselves that all is well, you know we will lie to others.

For many years I was in denial. Wearing many masks to cover up who I really was.

One of my biggest struggles have been with codependency. I engaged in co-dependent relationships; one in particular developing seriously unhealthy. Something I am not proud of.

Took a few years just to recover and some what function once again in society. I could not even keep a job. A tremendous about of shame, guilt and deep depression. I still struggle to this day with some of the after-effects from that relationship which happened close to 15 years ago. So I do have some more work in this area.

But, realize NOW I was only responding out of my own hurts and needs. The lack of nurturing/bonding from my parents. At the time I was not ready to face or let alone understand what was going on with me. My emotional pain took over. I was not ready to be honest with myself, my pain, nor my emotions:


Our relationship with ourselves is the most important relationship we need to maintain. The quality of that relationship will determine the quality of our other relationships.

When we can tell ourselves how we feel, and accept our feelings, we can tell others.

When we can accept what we want and need, we will be ready to have our wants and needs met.

When we can accept what we think and believe, and accept what's important to us, we can relay this to others.

When we learn to take ourselves seriously, others will too.

When we learn to chuckle at ourselves, we will be ready to laugh with others.

When we have learned to trust ourselves, we will be trustworthy and ready to trust.

When we can be grateful for who we are, we will have achieved self-love.

When we have achieved self-love and accepting our wants and needs, we will be ready to give and receive love.

When we've learned to stand on our own two feet, we're ready to stand next to someone.

Today, I will focus on having a good relationship with myself.

Hazelden Foundation

13 comments:

  1. To thine own self we must be true. I really like the devotional you shared. Praying that the Father will bring you to complete wholeness.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Dear JBR, I know what you have written is true. We need to be honest with ourselves, we need to be true to others. But you know something, I was true, I was speaking from my ehart what I thought. Problem was no one really bothered to hear the truth. And I tend to not be honest, just play along. I hate myself for this..but it seems others are happy not knowing anything. Not sure why?

    ReplyDelete
  3. I see so much progress in your journey. I am so proud and happy for your wellness. Thank you for sharing this awesome post today.

    Love and blessings,
    Pam

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh thank you for sharing this!

    ReplyDelete
  5. I really like the picture you chose to go along with this post. It says a lot.

    You're right-- being honest with ourselves is really hard to do. I know that for me, personally, I have a hard time being true to myself in social situations-- I always do what pleases others and never what I want to do.

    As always, thanks for sharing, JBR.

    Wishing you well,
    NOS

    ReplyDelete
  6. JBR, yes we need to be honest with ourselves and sometimes it's not easy but if we approach ourselves with love then I think it's possible ... hugs!!

    ReplyDelete
  7. "When we learn to chuckle at ourselves, we'll laugh with others too."

    I think you might have just healed my longest standing scar. I'll remember.

    ReplyDelete
  8. The hardest part of my recovery/sobriety IE: mental, emotional, physical was Mirror therapy. I had to look in a hand held mirror and talk to myself for 5 minutes while the therapist took notes. I was shy at first and then a beautiful thing happened, I forgave me.

    I have not looked back since that time. Honesty above all is my policy, requirement & saviour of self.
    Hugs to you today.
    Tammy

    ReplyDelete
  9. It's so true that being honest with ourselves is difficult -- for everyone. We are so good at pretending everything is fine when it's not because we think that's what is expected of us.
    You've come a long way. I cheer at your progress.
    Many Hugs
    Lyn

    ReplyDelete
  10. So good.
    Thank you for sharing
    both the wisdom
    and the wobbles,
    JBR.
    It's all beautiful
    on you:)
    -Jennifer

    ReplyDelete
  11. I loe the sentence "today I will have a good relationship with myself" I know how hard that is. By now I am there more often! (((( JBR ))))

    ReplyDelete