Today waking up, exhausted.... my hormones and frustration level have been way off the charts. When those collide, I have issues. The littlest thing brings me to tremendous anger. I have to watch my anger these days, because of my HBP.
Already this morning, I have already gone ballistic. Dropping a cap from the top of my water bottle onto the floor. Then throwing my keys against the wall out of anger, swearing up a storm, that I had to bend down and pick up the cap. And now the keys.
I really hate when I am this way. I can even anticipate my mood change a head of time, and I still have trouble controlling my outbursts. Other times when I am not so hormonal, picking up a cap from the floor would not set me off.
Yeah, I can blame most of it on hormones. But, I believe a lot has to do with the array of emotions building up in me these past few weeks. Dealing with myself, my mum, work and PPP issues. All at the same time:
Accept each day exactly as it comes to you. By that, I mean not only the circumstances of your day but also the condition of your body. Your assignment is to trust Me absolutely, resting in My sovereignty and faithfulness.
On some days, your circumstances and your physical condition feel out of balance: The demands on you seem far greater than your strength. Days like that present a choice between two alternatives-giving up or relying on Me. Even if you wrongly choose the first alternative, I will not reject you. You can turn to Me at any point, and I will help you crawl out of the mire of discouragement. I will infuse My strength into you moment by moment, giving you all that you need for this day. Trust Me, by relying on My empowering Presence.
-Sarah Young-
I love the part about "crawling out of the mire."
LOVELY DEVOTIONAL. I LIKE SARAH YOUNG. SHE CAN PUT WORDS TO YOUR FEELINGS. RECOGNIZING YOUR EMOTIONS LIKE YOU DO IS A GIFT. DON'T WORRY. YOU'RE HUMAN DEAR. ALWAYS ENJOY YOUR CANDOR.
ReplyDeleteMy motto for today is "Accept each day exactly as it comes to you." Beautifully said, and inspiring!
ReplyDeleteJBR, the way I see it, is that you realize your frustration and anger, and it's always the first important step to healing or working out that feelings. Hugs, my friend, hugs!!!
It certainly looks like our posts were meant to be together! I can understand entirely, it sucks when you can't have a true temper fit without realizing it ;) That means we are in touch with ourselves and our emotions. Bravo for writing about it, that's not easy either.
ReplyDeleteWe are all human and can have a bad day. You are in touch with your feeling and are doing your best. God is good to us even on bad days.
ReplyDeletei hope that the day gets better for you...in recognizing that it is not a good day (so far) we can do something about it...grace and love....for yourself and others...
ReplyDeleteI think we all reach our limits some days like that...Even harder when there's a lot on someone's plate, like you. I'm so glad that God enables us if we remind ourselves of His wonderful and faithful promises. (((JBR))).
ReplyDeleteI had to laugh as I read your entry JBR. I've thrown many of items as well during my mood swings. Some days are worse than others. Hoping you can get through this in one piece. wink wink
ReplyDeleteYou do have a lot going on and it is hard to control anger when there is so much going on. Maybe throwing keys is a good way to let off some steam. My therapist once told me I should chop wood to let off steam but with my luck I would probably chop off my toes or something. I know how frustrating it can be. I am thinking of you.
ReplyDeleteYou've had a rough couple of weeks. Even more stressful than usual because you needed to take care of your mom so I'm glad the keys were handy. I pray that your load lightens and that Jesus floods you with grace, my friend.
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