ANGER HAS NO TIME TABLE

“However, as with all emotions, anger doesn’t understand time. Anger doesn’t dissipate automatically if the danger occurred two minutes ago-or twenty years ago! It has to be worked through appropriately. Otherwise, anger simply lives inside the heart.

This is why individuals with injured boundaries often are shocked by the rage they feel inside when they begin setting limits. This is generally not “new anger”-it’s “old anger.” It’s often years of nos, that were never voiced, never respected, and never listened to. The protests against all the evil and violation of our souls sit inside us, waiting to tell their truths.”
(Taken from the book Boundaries)

Ah – ha. The above puts the understanding of what I am going through more into perspective. “….individuals with injured boundaries often are shocked by the rage they feel inside when they begin setting limits.”

So true.

I marvel at the amount of rage that comes out of me at the slightest inconvenience as I establish my boundaries and get in touch with my feelings of the past. The amount of rawness and violation that I feel when someone steps over my boundaries and the bubbling up of anger is unbelievable now. All this rage I have contained over the years has been festering inside. No wonder this kind of pain can hurt one’s physical body and cause so many diseases, even death. Ticks me off now to see that I was not allowed to express my anger growing up. It would only be natural for a child in their learning years not to understand “adult” things, to question, to become frustrated, to get angry…….but then to have it quashed with a parent saying …..”no we don’t do that.” And that is just what JBR did, “she did not do that, except stuff it.”