"Yet a time is coming
and has now come when the true worshipers will worship
the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the
kind of worshipers the Father seeks." - John 4:23

My Heavenly Daddy is healing
me from the inside out.

Transparency is Real.
Many times painful.

Daddy let me be secure in You only!

Wednesday, January 06, 2010

CHALLENGING OTHERS TO CHANGE


I do NOT confront often. In fact, I avoid it as much as possible. Watching debates on television upset me, and I turn the channel.

Fear of offending, not being liked and failure rings loud when the word confrontation comes up in my vocabulary. Nevertheless, I have done it! On more than one occasion! Not liking it as I go. I have pushed beyond what "I" thought were 'my limits' (I know I can do it) and faced the challenges, and have said some things as best I could in Christian love to someone(s) I cared about that I had some concerns over. Was not always easy! And also it is not always easy when you are on the receiving end too. Had many a time there mostly. But, if you are open to receiving a word and pray about it afterward, God will share with you what you need to see! But, you must be open to Him!

The devotional below shares that God has given us the duty and the ability to confront others in a compassionate tough love way in order to help.


Have you ever known that you were on the wrong path and needed someone to help guide you? Have you unknowingly been wrong and, looking back, wish someone had intervened? Confrontation is a loving and appropriate challenge. It's not pointing a finger at sin. It's pointing to the truth that sets us free.

Whether or not a hearty verbal interaction appeals to you, God has given you both the duty and the ability to confront others. Think of His Word as a relational textbook. In the beginning, God set an example when He called out to Adam after the first sin. From the initial questioning in Genesis to the fiery corrections in Revelation, the Bible shows God confronting His people . . . each time with the intent of molding them into the best they can be.

God has a history of using us to keep each other on track. Listen carefully. He may be asking you to help. When you do confront someone, ask God to search your heart and make your motives pure. Then ask for wisdom, words and courage. He'll be faithful to provide.
(Hope for the Heart)

24 comments:

  1. I haven't met too many role models who confront in love well. I avoid conflict too. On the other hand, I'd much rather have someone tell me what their thoughts than try to read their feelings.

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  2. stuck-in-the-middleJanuary 06, 2010

    JBR I'm not good at this either. Hang in there.

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  3. well, this sure put confrontation in a different perspective. i'm glad to have read this today.

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  4. Sweetie, you raised some good points here. Thanks for sharing.

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  5. Confronting someone is not easy and confronting them in a loving way is even not easier. But by God's grace, we can. It's only through His strength we can overcome. Times we don't know what to say, He'll even provide [like what your post says]...For He is the truth! Blessings JBR!

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  6. Awesome post dear!
    Hugs, GG

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  7. Hi JBR,
    Thanks for the post in light of my important meeting today. The Lord used it to speak to this "chicken little" . Fear is on her knees praying for courage.

    Blessings,
    Tammy

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  8. Confrontation is not easy for me either JBR. It seems to me that assertiveness is key in confronting others lovingly. Love conquering fear. Thanks for sharing! Oh, and thank you for your comments on my blog. Hugs and blessings to you as well! <3

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  9. LOVE is always the key!
    Blessings, andrea

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  10. Thank you for the words.

    God Bless.

    Regina

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  11. I don't confront very often but I tend to confront and then pray about it. I'm now learning to pray, seek God for his wisdom and then if lead to I will confront. Thanks for sharing.

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  12. I don't know...the quote from the above devotional says that 'God' confronted people throughout the Bible. I would say that's His job, not ours.

    I was on a blog the other day that swims in confrontation. You comment a post, and 10 people jump on it, tear it apart and compete to see who has the best thing to say...who has it right.

    I think I'll leave confrontation to God.

    "He was oppressed and afflicted, yet he did not open his mouth; he was led like a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is silent, so he did not open his mouth."

    Isaiah 53:7

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  13. Dear JBR:

    A fine thought for pondering. We often don't confront thinking that it will be all right but then it does not work for long. One has to confront at times when the need is pressing as well as pressurising.

    A well thought out post.

    Joy and strength always,
    Susan

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  14. Confronting is a thing I work hard on - surely I have a long way to go there too. Since I feel better in confronting myself I start feeling better about confronting others. Thanks for your ever so encouraging words on my blog. They are highly appreciated. Hugs form this side of the pond

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  15. That was a very sound, helpful thing to read.
    I suppose I find principles worth defending, and I can speak directly in defense of bigger values. But I can't fight and spar over petty things. It is a big contrast that leaves people rather confused about me. They think I am contentious, or brave, or tough--because I speak directly about certain things. Then they seemed surprised when I am hurt or scared by fighting over petty things. Its a difference very rarely pointed out and one that I am just realizing.

    Thanks.

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  16. JBR,

    Sometimes the most difficult things we have to do as Christians is confront a situation that needs correcting and still do it with the love of God in our hearts. May we enter that time in prayer before confronting them that the words that we speak to those come from God and not from our hearts!

    Love and Hugs ~ Kat

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  17. As you know, I've been faced with this a lot the past few weeks. I loathe confrontation myself as well. It's completely out of my comfort zone. Yet, I know it is something that we must do at times. I've said it numerous times, we are too much alike girl!
    Hugs to you!

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  18. I do not like confrontation either, now I just give my answer when asked.....they can accept or reject it, it's up to them. I never take their response personally and if they didn't want my opinion they shouldn't of asked. I make a point of not arguing, I just walk away and let them make up their own minds......:-) Hugs

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  19. Confrontation is very hard for me. This was a very good post.

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  20. gentle confrontation without fists is actually quite healthy

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  21. Interesting perspective on confrontation. I also dislike confrontation--mostly because the people with whom I've had confrontations in the past have been unmoveable--at least given my skills trying to reach them. And yet there are times it is necessary for us to speak--sometimes for the sake of others who will hear and see.

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  22. confronting is really had...for me I'm always afraid that fighter part of me will come out instead. good post. Sarah

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  23. You know, when you think about it, God "confronted" Adam & Eve in order to provoke confession & therefore restore fellowship with Him! And, we are told that we must speak the truth in love in order to turn eachother's hearts back to a right place with Him.
    Wylie

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  24. I've never thought about it as a "duty" to confront others...but I do believe that God gives the wisdom and ability to "confront with love"...when you sense Him nudging you to speak to someone...I'm so shy, this doesn't happen very often with me....

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