"Yet a time is coming
and has now come when the true worshipers will worship
the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the
kind of worshipers the Father seeks." - John 4:23

My Heavenly Daddy is healing
me from the inside out.

Transparency is Real.
Many times painful.

Daddy let me be secure in You only!

Monday, January 25, 2010

FEEL LIKE A NOTHING

I feel like a damn failure. The person is oblivious to what had happened. No confrontation. They are only contributing that my behavior is due to the fact my issues are affecting me more than usual. I feel worse than ever. Everso worthless, weak and used. I hate not having a grip on when I become to discouraged! I feel they have it all together and can handle anything, and I am still plagued by my deep emotional attachment to them which is just tearing me up inside. I want the pain to end! Boils down to not liking myself. If I did, I would be able to handle what is happening. I am trying so hard to rely on God at this point. I feel rejected and ignored. Trust is not there anymore. I know I am not all that I claim in this post and trying to desperately believe that I am not. But, I am sorry I am just not doing well, probably talking in circles.....

15 comments:

  1. I am so sorry you are in this place, JBR. rough spot, huh? I am thankful at moments like these to use slogans like be gentle with yourself, and progress not perfection. I also heard someone say recently in an alanon meeting to talk to yourself like you would talk to the cutest niece, nephew, or baby you know. I encourage you to try that, and not try to spin in what looks like regression or lack of growth. cyber hugs, if you want some. ang

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  2. (((((JBR))))
    Just here listening.....

    Lord, I pray that you would hold JBR and help her right now.
    In Jesus Name,
    Amen

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  3. Sorry to hear about what you are going through. I pray for the Lord to protect you and guide you at this time. May you feel His wondrous love and grace. Take care JBR.

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  4. (((((((((((( JBR ))))))))))))) I am so sorry for what you are feeling inside right now.

    You are such a beautiful person, honest and sincere, unselfish and kind. I pray that God will gently guide you through this dark storm, into the light. Take care, my friend.

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  5. This year I prayed for guidance, direction and clarity of vision. May God gently lead you to a quiet green meadow where you can feel secure and draw strength from Him. Hold on...

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  6. I'm sorry your going threw this, I'm here.
    I understand

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  7. Sweetie I know its hard and you want the pain to end. Please be careful. Praying for you.

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  8. Asking God to help you see yourself through His eyes, not your own eyes. Yours can be way too judgemental. You are precious.

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  9. JBR have you read any of Dr. Wayne Dyer's books, they could be helpful to you.
    I am praying you will find some confidence and have a better day tomorrow, sending you many hugs.....:-)

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  10. You are a powerful human being. You are full of potential. You are not a failure. We all fall and then we get up. Be strong. Keep growing. Enjoy the rest of your day.

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  11. Praying for peace and clarity right now for you precious friend.
    Wylie

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  12. I am so sorry you are in this place. It is a familiar one for me. Just keep moving... forwards or backwards, for me, as long as I am moving I know that I will be OK.

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  13. I think it will help if you find some activity to put time into a couple hours a day, become less focused on the big problem, expand your scope of things. I know it's easier for me to say it than it is for you to do it, but you CAN do something for yourself. For Yourself!

    Secretia

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  14. I'm so sorry to hear that you are struggling right now. I don't know exactly what's going on (I'm a new reader of your blog), but I do know that things can improve if you hang on. Please do your best to take care of yourself. You're in my thoughts.

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  15. what you are feeling is normal, it takes time to get away from those feelings of inaptitud. But you are getting there, working through them

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