Been struggling. I am sorting through a major stumbling block. This is a stronghold that I am holding on to.
This is a side of JBR where she can be very nasty. And has been. A side that has not really been dealt with when triggered. JBR somehow gets pleasure out of this nasty side of her. Where she has some control. Realizing that somehow the nastiness brings on boldness and a sense of safety. A "Don't mess with me. I see your fakeyness attitude." I display this behavior if for some reason I do not like you or I am afraid of you. I feel threaten. Does not matter what gender. Although dealing with a male concerns more with being safe and protected. Something deeper is going on here.
I'm glad you're able to recognize this "side" of you. I think we all have the ability to lash out on people when we feel angry or threatened. But unless we acknowledge its existence we can't work on it or tame it. Keep on keeping on, JBR. I'm sorry you're struggling.
ReplyDeleteWishing you well,
NOS
JBR I had an experience just recently when I erupted. It kind of surprised me and I was like where did that come from. Later I was convicted in my spirit. I prayed and asked God to forgive me. We have a loving God that will do that and then we can move on. The Holy Spirit will continue to probe our hearts if there still needs areas to be addressed.We're all under construction..
ReplyDeleteI sometimes still lash out like you did. It is about my insecurities and control. I hope you work this out.
ReplyDeleteBig hugs and lots of prayers being sent your way.
Yes those strong holds are tough...Hugs!
ReplyDeletekim
Praying for extra strength for you.
ReplyDeleteDena here and there will be prayers said for you tonight...May God's blessings be all over you~~~And heres a Big Hug from me too~~~Dena
ReplyDeletehi jbr~ i hear you. my first thought here is that in using the word "nasty" that suggests you may feel some shame or judgement about this side of you. i just want to offer that this part of you, though you might not feel good about it or it's results, does sound like it acts as a protective or strong part. i tend to be harsh in my evaluations of myself. i hope you're taking it easy on yourself. and i hope this rough time goes quickly and you are able to understand and feel at peace about what all is going on with you~
ReplyDeletewishing you peace~~~
We all have a nasty side in us. I'll pray you learn to understand it and control it.
ReplyDeleteBlessings,
Lyn