Most my life I felt incomplete. I can safely look back now to how I emotionally survived my upbringing.
When I saw the picture above, it kind of reminded me of how I felt emotionally. Only part of me was present. Enough to give an appearance. But, emotionally I checked out and left no forwarding address many years before.
Miraculously I was saved way back in 1977 watching a Billy Graham crusade on the television. As isolated as I was, God still found me alone in my bedroom. Sealed in a tomb full of fear, anger, resentment, hatred, hurt and pain. Having the only outlet of a television and rock music for relief.
Had no clue that God was offering me love. Still in the process of experiencing and finding this out. But improving. Realizing now, my past hindered my growth in the Lord for all those years.
Unfortunately from 1977 to more or less now, my walk with God was dead. Only having the assurance up to this time of my salvation. But fortunately with t. and Godly guidance, I am healing and realizing the wonderful promises and benefits that go along with my salvation.
What is a a sure indication that I am healing is that I am so much on fire for the Lord and hunger for Him. I want my picture to be complete one day. Whole and filled in. Naturally, our complete wholeness will occur once we get to Glory.
"Being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ.” (Philippians 1:6)
Great reflection, JBR. Loving another Jesus loving sister on fire for the Lord and hungering for Him.
ReplyDeleteJBR this made me cry. You're coming full circle one day soon. I can feel it in my bones. God will not let you down if you stay after him. God bless.
ReplyDeleteYour last paragraph.....exactly what I want. I am not doing my part. I know He's waiting for me. I am ashamed. Keep growing in your faith. I do know that it's the only thing in the world that matters. Christ is the only one who saves. Peace.
ReplyDeletethank God for Billy Graham!
ReplyDeleteI too gave my heart
lock stock and barrel
(as much as I was able
which wasn't much because so much
of my heart was stuffed down tight)
during one of his crusades.
My Godwalk began then too as a child.
Then life and brokenness happened
and it all became a journey back.
I love that we share that.
Love and healing happening
always,
Jennifer
I love this photo and it represents how as you say we can be present but not present at the same time. Funnily enough I reconnected to God and church through Billy Graham as well in a rally held at Glasgow, Scotland. I saw it advertised in a shop window and it kept coming into my mind so I went. I had no contact with church at the time. I have many questions for God about how why he let things happen, did not intervene. I have a love/anger relationship but I know God understands and I am working on that to. Thank you for sharing.
ReplyDeleteI love your testimony. Every day we learn more about God and ourselves. It is a great and interesting journey. God bless.
ReplyDeleteWe are all works in progress. And you are right we will only be complete once we get to glory. Wonderful post, JBR.
ReplyDeleteKeep running the race JBR.
ReplyDeleteThis line right here, "my past hindered my growth in the Lord for all those years" is how I feel as well. I feel I could have been much further on my journey if I didn't rebel and do things that are not in accordance with God's will for my life.
ReplyDeleteI'm grateful for His love, grace and His mercy that have preserved me for this time that, just as you, I am now on fire for My Lord. Great Post.
Be encouraged and keep walking in faith. That last scripture in your post is so amazing, I have read it many times and each time I've read it-it makes me feel warm inside, knowing that God keeps His promises, there is proof of that all throughout the Bible. I can rely on Him to make sure I stay on the straight and narrow, so can you. :-)
You are so very precious, you are one of God's masterpieces.
ReplyDeleteWe sing a chorus based on the Scripture -
ReplyDeleteThe fulness of the Godhead bodily dwelleth in my Lord (3)
And we are complete in Him
We are complete in Christ
I checked out too, Grace. I didn't really realize I had done this until many years later when God started healing my emotions.
ReplyDeleteExcellent post- I think your openness helps a lot of people and I pray for your continued healing.
(Good grief! I have to pound the f's and d's to get them to work! She must have dripped ice cream
or something on my laptop!)
The picture is pretty amazing. I am glad you have HIM now!
ReplyDelete