"Yet a time is coming
and has now come when the true worshipers will worship
the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the
kind of worshipers the Father seeks." - John 4:23

My Heavenly Daddy is healing
me from the inside out.

Transparency is Real.
Many times painful.

Daddy let me be secure in You only!

Friday, November 30, 2012

SALVE TO MY WOUNDS

Yesterday in therapy we discussed me giving the guilt, shame, condemnation, fears etc. over to the individual who makes me react to those. My mum and dad. My brother we will tackle at another session. As that is more of a delicate issue involving the sexual abuse.

Even though my dad has been dead over twenty years, this still applies.

I went this morning to see my mum. Right away I had the opportunity to put to use the tools my therapist told me to use. Warding off the snide comments from my mum of my appearance. She uses the word matronly . There are two words I detest. Matronly and Fondly. You either like, love or hate me.

It is not easy. In order for me to heal further, I need to implement these tools. Giving back what she feels herself. That is all it is. She is so uncomfortable with herself for years she transfers her pain to me.

So silently under my breath when I am attacked face to face, (she does not listen to reason) I first rebuke the attack. Then say
"This condemnation is not mine. I am not taking on the guilt and shame it brings." And if I remember to also add, "God is pleased with who I am." That I am fearfully and wonderfully made. In His image!

Right now these are words I am saying. Anger still builds up in me when I am attacked BUT.... it is a beginning.

I am confessing what I know is to be truth. As I trust my therapist. And most of all I am trusting what God says.

One day the truth will stick in my little heart and become like a salve to my wounds.

5 comments:

  1. HI GRACE - hope this holiday season allows you some peace and joy, freedom from the pain and hard work. Time to balance -
    Love Gail
    peace.....

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  2. Hi hon,
    Great tactic and I tell you it works!! Really. When someone says something to me that I know is a satanic attack I say, "I deny this in Jesus' name.", or "I do not accept this in Jesus' name." I love how your T added on a declaration of who you are in Christ. Awesome!

    Blessings,
    <><

    ReplyDelete
  3. It's good that the therapist is giving you tools to help you. Good luck to you.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Glad your therapy is working.

    ReplyDelete