"Yet a time is coming
and has now come when the true worshipers will worship
the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the
kind of worshipers the Father seeks." - John 4:23

My Heavenly Daddy is healing
me from the inside out.

Transparency is Real.
Many times painful.

Daddy let me be secure in You only!

Tuesday, December 01, 2009


Thank you all for your recent comments to my last post!!

Your love and continued support is so welcomed!!!

It is amazing the increase of spiritual and emotional attack from the enemy during times when you feel you are at your weakest. Yeah, sometimes life seems not fair....

I need not lie to you, it has not been easy!!!! Especially this past week. I have never witnessed myself so vulnerable in so many areas of my emotions. My walls of defenses have broken down. I am exposed and raw. The rawness is so like I am out in freezing weather, no shoes on, no coat, exposed to the elements. The wind and cold cuts through me like a knife! The numbing sting of the cold seem SO unbearable!! I cry out to God to let the pain stop!! Or at least give me a resbit!!! The tears, the tears, the tears!!

I look at my emotional chart. There I am. Penned in. Plain as day. My heart surgery is still scheduled to happen, regardless.


  1. Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day. For our light affliction, which is but for a moment [as seen from God's eternity], is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory, while we do not look at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal." 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

    God Bless

  2. stuck-in-the-middleDecember 01, 2009

    JBR you hang in there! You've come a long way. You'r strong and God is with you.

  3. At the risk of sounding like a total asshole I want to ask you honestly why you see satan as your enemy?

    Did God defeat him? Did God through the resurrection of the Christ defeat once and forever every, all and the last weapon satan had which is death?

    If the answer to the above is yes, in pure unadulterated Christian doctrine how can something or someone defeated be an enemy any longer? No I am not suggesting you make friends with demons but rather that you recognize your enemies defeat and where you actually and truly stand in relation to that defeated enemy. Your foot on its head, the victor. You do know you have position within that body of Christ correct? I may be the callous on the ball of the foot but still it is part and portion of the body, no?

    Darkness, be it a lack of light or a lack of insight has only the power you give it. If you enter a dark room what is it you do? Freeze in fear or turn on a damn light? Me? I turn on a light because bumping into furniture hurts the shins.

    You obviously know many of the words of the Christian text. That is good. That is knowledge. Knowledge is good, lack of it destroys people.

    Wisdom though...wisdom is the application of that knowledge. Seek wisdom above all else and you will find the ways to what ever else it is you look for.

    OK I am done now. Be Well Be Wise.

  4. Your strength will shine through, JBR

  5. Remember: "the joy of the Lord is your strength" neh. 8:10 and HE will continue to see you through.
    Blessings and hugs,

  6. (((JBR)))

    Lots of hugs coming ur way!

  7. JBR,
    Keep battling. Keep suiting up in the gear described in Ephesians. We are at war and until Christ returns we will always be at war with an enemy that seeks to destroy us (1 Peter 5:8).
    We don't have to live defeated lives but we do have to be aware of the principalities and powers of this world. We overcome by the sword of the Spirit which is the word of God.

  8. Heart surgery? We all need that! Glad that you're already having yours! Because when it's over, those things that are slowing you down, would be cut off by the Master Surgeon...JBR, your weaknesses invite His power to strengthen and transform you. Glory to God! Take care!

  9. oh hunny, love and hugs and healing prayers are coming your way...

  10. When is your surgery? I am so sorry that if you've posted it, I didn't see it. I am so concerned for you and I pray that all will be okay. Many hugs and well wishes.

  11. You are ALWAYS so real! I truly admire your willingness to expose you true self at the stage you are in to others in your truthful way! If we admit it, we all are in some area "unfinished" even knowing that the enemy is defeated! You do what so many of us don't have the guts to, and that's to admit it out loud!! Believe it, your testimony is helping many people who read your blog, dear sister!Love and Hugs {{{JBR}}} !!
    Jesus loves you and appreciates you, and so do I!

  12. JBR,
    Sending Love and lots of hugs to you. (((JBR))).
    You are so brave.


  13. For some reason, a quote kept coming to mind when I read this post. "Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly."
    Transformation is painful. I'm so sorry you are hurting. I also believe you can and will press through the pain and find what is on the other side.

  14. Pain is the touchstone of all growth. Change is scary and feelings suck sometimes. The truth is that we HAVE to feel the feelings to get to the other side. Stuffing them doesn't work. Have faith that you are on the right path and this too shall pass! Love and hugs to you!

  15. Good heavens! I hope you feel better soon. That's excruciating! Blessings.

  16. JBR ~

    As I read your words and felt your pain I thought immediately of Romans 8 and prayed Gods Word over you knowing that HE is doing a mighty thing in and through you. When the Lord performs heart surgery on us we become more of who HE created us to be.....pruning is never easy but so very worth it.

    Love and Hugs to you

  17. My thoughts are with you.

  18. Even though it's painful now, your outcome will be brilliantly wonderful!  Hugs.

  19. Courage is continuing onward despite the fear and the pain. Continue being brave, JBR! It's hard, but you are worth it.

  20. Keep focusing on your faith. You ARE getting through it. You ARE healing! Whoo hoo dear one! Whoo hoo!

  21. God is working in you! Keep your focus on him. Call upon his mighty power to sustain you through this present trial.

  22. Stay strong girl. He's got you in the palm of His hands. Sarah

  23. Your heart is in the safest hands in the universe. God will see you through, dear one. Rest in His tender care.

    Praying for you,

  24. God created your beautiful heart, and He will protect it. He will not allow it to be destroyed. I love you.