Trembling and bewildered, the women went out and fled from the tomb. They said nothing to anyone, because they were afraid. Mark 16:8
God knows we are weak and that our courage is limited. He knows that fear is part of our human condition.
Slowly, I am learning that He, above all does NOT shame me for being afraid. He can still use me, sweaty palms and everything to get His message out and help others. The Scripture above does eventually go on to say that courage was granted the women. They were able to speak.
As I continue to strengthen in areas of my life that have been very painful, fear tries its best to paralyze me. I still stumble. Fear can be like a frightening storm.
Tornadoes have always fascinated me. Never been in one. The power, the destruction, the uncertainty. In tornado alley, an approaching tornado sounds a loud alarm warning you to move to safety. What do you do in the face of fear? What does your sounding alarm do for you? How does fear define you?
Does fear immobilize you and force you to spiral down like a tornado or shoot you up moving you to a higher and better place?
Fear is playing a BIG PART in me not receiving the fullest of the Joy of the Spirit! Fear of what others will think of me once I let go under His anointing. I know the joy is in me, ready to be released. Sometimes it feels like a gush of pressure in my throat ready to be expelled, only fear remains in the way and sometimes I even start to cough. Do you understand?
So, how does fear define me... well, when fear comes upon me now, as much as I have the tendency to want to run and hide because of the past shame and scolding by my mother to "behave properly," I try now to let the fear take me closer to trusting God. Seeking wisdom to what I need to learn and grow from it. It is not easy!
Fear is powerful. I've been so bound to fear in the past. But praise God for the great victories I've found as I learn to trust Him more and more. Yes, I still have fear. I want that fear to push me up higher towards Him and towards reaching out to others. I want courage to face all storms. He is my shelter. I can run and hide myself in Him.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing. Good stuff.
JBR,
ReplyDeleteThe one thing I remember when I am fearful is to remember that God uses my weakness to cause me to look to Him for trust and a way to solve my issues. It is only through my weakness that I am made strong again.
Love and Hugs ~ Kat
Ohhh.that pic of the tornado is scary! Looks so powerful! But if I see one coming? I will take cover. Better yet, conquer my fear by hiding in our Refuge. Take care JBR!
ReplyDeleteI hate to say it but I think fear defines me in a very limited scared little child way.
ReplyDeleteOver and over I see in my life that fear is everywhere, stopping me here, limiting me there, pushing me back, not wanting me to go over the edge. And I am getting a little bit sick of it. I want to feel alive, scream it on the top of my lungs 'Alive, she cried'. But I don't. Not yet.
Keep running to the Father sweetie.
ReplyDeleteFirst let me say thank you for the compliment of the picture on my blog. It was actually the sun setting all the way across the street through my front window blinds as I was sitting in my computer chair I knew the sun was setting, I just grabbed my camera turned around had the camera on macro setting and zoomed in on one little section of the blinds and that is what the picture was of. Thank you so much for your compliment...I am learning to really be able to define from my soul what the word beautiful means. I had to look it up the first time my editor used it to describe something...I wasn't sure.
ReplyDeleteYou are such a beautiful soul I want to remind you of that...I love this entry I am spending such a huge part of my life just walking through 'it'...fear is not defining me today...I don't know that faith is yet but I do know that fear IS NOT! I love your blog, your journey and your soul you are such a sweet spirit and I am so grateful to be sharing this journey with you...fear whispers in my head...fear is doubt today but not paralyzing me so I am not living my dream....i am a published writer/photographer for a paper...that is a dream come true...of course i am terrified but I just keep walking...what kind of shoes do you have JBR? I bet you have them for the long haul don'tcha? ((((((hugzzzzz)))))
fear, if handled correctly, helps us to push our boundaries, which lets us discover marvels we'd otherwise never get to see.
ReplyDeleteI love your blog and the way you write. I have spent what feels like a lifetime facing fears and trying to get to the bottom of where they come from in my own life. The lies that I swallowed as a child, and the fears the developed as a result and the awsome truth that sets us free when we discover it.
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