"Yet a time is coming
and has now come when the true worshipers will worship
the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the
kind of worshipers the Father seeks." - John 4:23

My Heavenly Daddy is healing
me from the inside out.

Transparency is Real.
Many times painful.

Daddy let me be secure in You only!

Thursday, September 30, 2010

KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT


This statement rings loud in my heart many-a-time!

A lot of us can learn from the below devotional. I know I can.

Some times it is better not to say anything then to stick your foot in your mouth.

I can be one to quickly criticize. But, you would have to really irk me. Nevertheless, I would criticize more to another person about you then to you directly.

This is a big struggle area for me and I am trying to be more conscientious of the fact. My father criticized. Finding fault with others, somehow eases my pain, takes the focus off of me and makes me feel better about myself.

In recovery, I am learning to recognize a lot of my survival techniques of protection that I used in the past when I was growing up. Recognizing now, some of them can be adjusted for the better.

Sometimes I will even pull myself aside before I open my mouth and say, "Now JBR do you really want to say this? Who is benefiting? Huh?" Does not always work though.

Then at the same time I can be ever so encouraging. And really mean it too. Then I wonder "where did that come from?"

I am finding that it holds true that if I let some time go by (a few minutes) in a possible criticizing situation, my desire to bash someone verbally subsides. Not an easy task though. Because my flesh wants to get in the way.

I know I was put to the test these past few days at work. Some times I was successful, other times it was like I had diarrhea of the mouth.


"So much to say. And so much not to say! Some things are better left unsaid. But so many unsaid things can become a burden." — Virginia Mae Axline

The occasions are many when we'd like to share a feeling, an observation, perhaps even a criticism with someone. The risk is great, however. She might be hurt, or he might walk away, leaving us alone.

Many times, we need not share our words directly. Weighing and measuring the probable outcome and asking for some inner guidance will help us decide when to speak up and when to leave things unsaid. But if our thoughts are seriously interfering with our relationships, we can't ignore them for long.

Clearing the air is necessary sometimes, and it freshens all relationships. When to take the risk creates consternation. But within our quiet spaces, we always know when we must speak up. And the direction will come. The right moment will present itself. And within those quiet spaces the right words can be found.

If I am uncomfortable with certain people, and the feelings don't leave, I will consider what might need to be said. I will open myself to the way and ask to be shown the steps to take. Then, I will be patient.

Hazelden Foundation

16 comments:

  1. Wonderful, thanks for sharing.

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  2. The picture says it all.. cute.

    Keep learning and growing.

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  3. I FIND MY SELF TO MANY TIMES STICKING MY FOOT IN MY MOUTH. YOUR POST SHARES ALOT WHAT IS REQUIRED. MY M-I-L IS A REAL CHALLENGE FOR ME. I SAY THINGS TO HER THAT I KNOW WHILE I'M SAYING THEM I SHOULDN'T. I HAVE THE TENDENCY TO CUT PEOPLE DOWN ONLY BECAUSE. BUT MAYBE IT'S BECAUSE I DON'T FEEL GOOD ABOUT MYSELF. I HAVE TO MAKE OTHERS LOOK BAD. I'VE ALOT TO PONDER IN YOUR POST.

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  4. a great read this morning, one to take to heart.

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  5. think this is one we can all use...nice write...

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  6. Can relate. Like you I still would like to speak to often for the not so good. Not for me, not for others. I find too that I am still clumpsy in cjosing words when now standing up for myself and say cordially and in "I" messages. Yes, many former tools have far outlived their usefullness yet other can be adjusted like my inner voice! I am doing so much better with it. Hugs to you.

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  7. I love that picture... So cute. Very needed post.

    Blessings,
    Tammy

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  8. I'm at fault too, sometimes it get too much you just cannot control, but say what need to be said. Try I must to abstain. OOmph.. OOmph.

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  9. Cute puppies! Also, I think everyone feels critical of others at time. But I think you're right-- it's a matter of when to keep the criticisms to yourself.

    Wishing you well,
    NOS

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  10. Very good post! I am learning too..to control my flesh.

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  11. That is a very important lesson to learn. It's not an easy one to practice but with time it will become easier. Often working it out in your head and not saying it can be the past plan of action. I learned that years ago.

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  12. Oh Sister, I need to keep my mouth shut too -- so many times! God help us. As a matter of fact, my hormones (using them as the excuse today) are urging me to want to be "ugly" with a bunch of noisy people in the library right now. I'm glad I read your post to remind me to keep my mouth SHUT.

    Love!
    b

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  13. Thank you for your thoughtful posts and for returning to my site to check in on me. I appreciate it more than you know...

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  14. This inspired me! I love that you're thinking about everyone and their feelings!

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  15. We are doing a study called "Conversation Peace" by Mary Kassian. She presents seven biblical principles to help women revolutionize their speech habits and positively avoid sharing gossip, throwing negative barbs, or snapping sarcastic replies throughout everyday life. I have to see it has opened my eyes!

    Great study!

    Blessings~
    Laura

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  16. Now that picture says a mouthful! You've shared some wonderful words of wisdom.

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