"Yet a time is coming
and has now come when the true worshipers will worship
the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the
kind of worshipers the Father seeks." - John 4:23

My Heavenly Daddy is healing
me from the inside out.

Transparency is Real.
Many times painful.

Daddy let me be secure in You only!

Friday, February 18, 2011


My spirit is so unsettled today. Lack of sleep. I am so restless and exhausted. So......

Life can be hell!

Speaking for myself as well. Even in our deepest pain, God is there! For some of us it may be hard to grasp that concept as we go through our recovery. We are in such despair and emotional pain. We feel so alone. We cry out. We lash out. We scream out. We curse out! Who would share our pit of hell, our anguish, tears, fears, desperation, confusion with us? God would.

There is no unfamiliar place that He has not gone to. He will meet us in our mire. We may not think it at the time. But, He is there. In knowing that He is always there, then there is always hope:

"If I go to the heavens, you are there; If I make my bed in the depths, you
are there.
Psalm 139:8

Sometimes life is hell. That's how it feels. It feels like we have taken up residence in hell. Sometimes the darkness overwhelms us. Sometimes we hurt so much that we can't imagine experiencing joy or peace ever again. Sometimes we seem to have 'made our bed ' in a place that God has deserted, a place from which God has turned away.

But the psalmist says 'even if I make my bed in the depths, you are there'. There are no genuinely God-forsaken places on our journey. There are no places unfamiliar to God. It is a difficult and painful journey, but our lines of support are not stretched thin. God is not at a distance. God is with us.

If God is with us, we can travel through those dark times in recovery, those times in hell. If God is with us, we can hold on through the difficult emotional and spiritual roller coaster of recovery.

No matter where I am, Lord
you are with me.
If I am up, today.
You are here.
If I am down.
You are here.
If I am very, very down.
You are still here.
If I am very, very, very, very, very down.
You are here.
Thank you.
Even in the terrible times when I am in the depths, you are there with me.
Your presence is a ray of hope
in the dark times of my recovery.

Copyright Dale and Juanita Ryan


  1. yes he is...and he has the powerto over come...

  2. Yes sometimes life is hell but God is there...he meets us wherever we are at...(((JBR)))

  3. I wish you a better night sleep tonight. Hang in there JBR. ((hug))

  4. I got shivers reading this! Yes, God is always there for us - lifting us, healing us, consoling our wounded hearts, and cherishing us. May his sweet love surround you, dear friend :)
    JBR, I was deeply touched by the words you left on my blog. You are a beautiful soul. Thank you.

  5. JBR,
    I love this healing process you are going through! Keep your eyes on Jesus for like you said He is there and right now I believe He is holding you.
    I call God Daddy too!! Especially when I feel like a little girl I will call out to Him Daddy, Daddy watch me!

    Daddy, please comfort and bless JBR your sweet daughter. Hold her, rock her manifest Yourself to her so she knows without a doubt that You are with her 24/7. Thank you for creating this precious gem of a girl. Mold her gently. Craft her carefully. I see the gentle spirit in her that is breaking free. Break it free Dad and let it shine! Let You shine forth from her and reach those who need to be touched. Touch her with energy today and help her to sleep peacefully at night.....fully.....restfully....Thank You Father, You are so good. Praise Your Holy name! Draw her into Your perfect self. In the name of Jesus Christ the Lamb amen.


  6. I am sorry that you are having sleep problems like me. It ruins the self of anything positive. I love the reminder that God is always with us. Sometimes we forget to look up and see Him.

    JBR, you are making so much progress in your journey. It is good to give thanks in all of our situations.

    Love to you,

  7. I love that prayer. Hugs.

  8. He will never leave us or forsake us....because of that..there is always hope....

    Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted within me? hope in God: for I shall yet praise him, [who is] the health of my countenance, and my God. Psalms 43:5

    One of my favorites....I repeat it to myself often.....blessings,Shelley

  9. That was beautiful!

  10. "Amen,amen,amen"!!!! It's so good to know that some Christians are "Keeping It Real"!!!
    Love ya :-)

  11. this is so beauitiful. i love your blog! and i love this psalm, it's my favourite. i also love the verses about 'you know when i sit and when i rise... you are familiar with all my ways'
    sometimes we also get down about being perfect. we fret and make mistakes and afterwards can often get down and feel as though god is disappointed with our imperfection. but i love that he knows 'all our ways' that means the stupid ones too! and he loves us regardless. it's nice to know we can just fall back on him and trust in his perfection changing us when we cant seem to get better. much love