"Yet a time is coming
and has now come when the true worshipers will worship
the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the
kind of worshipers the Father seeks." - John 4:23

My Heavenly Daddy is healing
me from the inside out.

Transparency is Real.
Many times painful.

Daddy let me be secure in You only!

Monday, August 20, 2012

YOU ARE WORTH IT


I did not think this post would affect so many of you. WoW! You all are wonderful!
YOU ARE WORTH IT

"You're worth something because God says you’re worth something—not because of what people think or say about you." - Joyce Meyer

Majority of my healing process is accepting who I am in Christ. Not from people in order to feel good about myself.

For many years I have put on masks in order for people to like NOT the real me (because I did not like or even know the real me), but to like what I thought others would like. Hiding the real me. I was soooooo very afraid of who I was. Literally hiding in many cases. Would not share an opinion, a comment and keep to myself for fear of being wrong and scolded.

I so longed for people to like me. To feel accepted and loved.

Accepting and liking myself as someone of worth has always been a struggle for me. My background growing up was traumatic. Alcoholic parents divorcing, fighting, yelling, family splitting up, me pulled away from family and friends to another part of the country when I was 9/10. Being sexually abused by my older brother around the same time. Establishing the ground work for confusion, fear, lack of proper nurturing from both parents and then ultimately shutting myself down emotionally. Resulting in dysfunction.

Learning most of my dysfunction early on from a very fearful, overbearing and controlling mum who had issues herself with dealing with divorcing my father, breaking up of our family, then remarrying right away to fill her emptiness and guilt.

I then checked out emotionally in order to survive what I had been going through. Especially disassociating during my teen years. My attention span was nil and school was a farce for me to retain hardly anything academically. I was walking around in a body pretending someone was home, but the little girl inside had left a long time ago. Creating her own fantasy world of people in her mind in order to feel good about herself.

Wo, I had no clue this post was going to go this way. It was supposed to be simple and short like most of mine these days. I guess I had to lay some groundwork once again in order to lead up to the answer to self worth! And that is finding our worth in Christ.

I still struggle with my Heavenly Daddy accepting me and loving me. But, I am drawing closer to His love as I heal.

Most my masks have been discarded and the real me exposed. On occasion I will put one on. Until I work through the situation that called for it and get my true self and worth in order once again.

We do not have to perform for our Heavenly Daddy. He accepts us just as we are. He knows every little pain we went through and will go through. He knows we are broken people living in a broken world. He loves us unconditionally regardless. We always have the assurance of our worth in Him! Hallelujah! When people let us down, and they will, believe me they will, our Heavenly Daddy will never! He is someone we can ALWAYS count on! And He says we are Worth It!

21 comments:

  1. JBR a wonderful thought provoking post. God's love is personal. He knows each of us individually and loves us personally. Acceptance. His is a mighty love that has no beginning and no end. It's this experiencing of God’s love that distinguishes Christianity from all other religions. Why does God love us and acceptance us? It's because of who He is: "God is love." I just preached to myself. God Bless.

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  2. This is great post! Holding on to Papa God's hand, you have come so far sweetie.
    Hugs,
    Tammy

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  3. Hey lovely girl,

    I totally (like totally) relate to this. I just want to say that total freedom from all this is possible (I'm living proof of it) and that you're on the right path.

    Establishing my identity in Christ went a long way to healing the hurts I had and clearing up a whole lot of issues!

    Lots of love to you today

    Ursula

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  4. BB, The Lord just won't allow me to get to far away from you today! Here, I am trying to design a new blog. Not giving up Wildflowers and country roads, yet. Like one of my children, hehe. Just will keep in hiatus until I feel ready to delete it all or continue. Thing is....I am so smiling here, I posted my REAL thoughts on your blog of yesterday, I believe, about the women in church. That is what came to my HEART as I read, once, twice, a third time. I read over my comment twice. Was it too harsh? Flaky? Off topic? You see, I have always struggled to let "Lynn" show. This is what the new blog is to do. Not a total deviation from prior blog, I always come through, but then I pull back again. God does know us individually, as stated in first comment. He also brings others struggling with similiar issues together, such as your posting, today. HE is showing me, I am not alone in my struggle, I am not "freaky" because I struggle. So, BB, you have inspired me by your honesty, your courage to BE REAL, your beautiful words. Hehe, I am lots older than you, so don't think this "struggle" thing ever really goes away for those of us who truly want to come as close to the Lord as we can, this side of heaven. Big blessings my beautiful, inspirational friend. I think.....through your post, HE answered my question, "who needs yet another blog? There are so many beautiful, inspirational ones, Lord. What can I add?" I believe He is telling me, that the new blog I am working on may just be needed, someday down the road to reach out and touch another struggling human, as you have touched me today. HOW GREAT THOU ART. Love you in Him, BB.

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  5. What a hurting childhood you had and I thank God coz He has saved you and continue healing you and making you as an inspiration for others. I had too a difficult childhood and been restored by God. And I am so thankful to feel loved by God now. Keep it up JBR.

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  6. Oh boy!!! See how human I am here, I just messed up and instead of running away, humiliated, I am actually saying, "Yup, have been reading both Beloved Bomber's and Just Be Real posts this morning. I read a prior JBR post but did not comment, it was deep, I needed to prayer on it. Everything, I wrote in the comment is totally true, because to me, both BB and JBR have touched me in my struggles. So, JBR, I thank you and I thank BB because both of you have allowed the Lord to work through your words I have read this morning, to touch me deeply. If you knew how I have played around with a new blog concept/design etc etc, you would know that my HEART took in your precious words, yet my mind is kind of on overlook as far as "details" go, right now. Yup, the old me would delete my first comment, never shaming myself before others bloggers of my error. I so want to be REAL, finally in my life. So no deleting, just REAL, messing up, apologizing, going forward. Thank you JBR for inspiring me, even when a post is too deep for me to comment on at that moment.

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  7. JBR, my heart is full for you today. There is so much I can relate to in your life story. Keep seeking answers, keeping reaching out to God. Many of your experiences, I have experienced also, but I stand here today, saved by Amazing Grace, living a joy filled life. You can do this too!

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  8. OH! And here's a hug for you today!

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  9. I'M TEARING UP! MY HEART IS FULL OF MY OWN ISSUES FROM MY PAST. I HAVE TO TAKE A BREATH AND REFOCUS. JBR YOU'RE TRULY AN INSPIRATION TO MANY OF US.

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  10. Me also you've struck a nerve. This post and the post before hit home. My dad used to beat me growing up. Not much luv there.

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  11. LaughingcowAugust 20, 2012

    Nice blog a must

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  12. Sending big hugs to you. I know how you must please our Father's heart with your openess and hunger for healing.

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  13. "We do not have to perform for our Heavenly Daddy. He accepts us just as we are." Let the Church say Amen! Great post!

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  14. The reason I quit attending church was because of this very thing, pretense. I was so tired of loving the Lord with my whole heart but having to perform like a circus animal in church to fit into the mold of what the preacher said a Christian is. For years and years I got up and went to church. But what nobody knew was that I despised it, hated it, and sat in the parking lot white-knuckling my steering wheel while begging the Lord for the strength to go in! I finally began to question it. "Lord, if this is what you have for me and other Christians, then why isn't it a complete joy for me? Why don't I anticipate instead of dread? How is this glorifying you if it's not something I'm giving you without the proverbial blemish? Is it not a blemished sacrifice to come to church while begrudging the gesture?" He answered me. "Yes daughter, it is. If you don't want to attend, then I'd rather you be true to me by honoring your true self. Don't go to church because someone says so or because you think it pleases and honors me because it doesn't. How can I feel honored by your gesture when it's not in your heart to do so? I'd rather you not. It's like the broken promise...I would rather you don't promise instead of promising and then breaking it." And that's when I decided to leave the church and serve Him with as much transparency as possible. That meant honoring me and Him. Now, I have complete peace and walk with God as I am. Take me at face value. I have nothing to hide!

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  15. Much to think on...hugs. I've just discovered your lovely blog, and am now following! So nice to "meet" you! ♥
    Hugs,
    Anne

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  16. Walking around in a body pretending like somebody was home...what great words to describe a truth that so many can relate to. One of the hardest truths for me to grasp about our God is that I dont have to work for His approval. Sometimes I get caught up in that...it's a lovely post. We are His Beloveds and He is ours :)

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  17. Hi JBR ~ I am so thankful we don't have to perform for our Heavenly Daddy! He loves us no matter what!
    Great post. Thank you for sharing. You inspire me always! Blessings

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  18. Yes, indeed. We are all God's children and all worthy in his eyes. We need to remind ourselves of that. I hope you enjoy your day.

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